


"Near Death Experience"

by LovelyZelda



Category: Star Trek: The Original Series
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2010-05-02
Updated: 2010-05-02
Packaged: 2017-10-09 06:17:53
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,074
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/83925
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/LovelyZelda/pseuds/LovelyZelda
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Fill for <a href="http://community.livejournal.com/st_tos_kink/485.html?thread=35813#t35813">this prompt</a> over in <a href="http://community.livejournal.com/st_tos_kink/profile"><img/></a><a href="http://community.livejournal.com/st_tos_kink/"><b>st_tos_kink</b></a>-Land: <i>Kirk/Spock/McCoy. The trio has never had sex, but they've all thought about it; never told each other they love each other, but they've all thought about it; never cuddled or done any other fluffy things with each other, but they've all thought about it. Basically, they've never acknowledged that they are all three madly in love with another.</i></p><p>I want something to make 'em admit it. The rest of the crew, aliens, spores, ANYTHING. Please.</p><p>Kirk, Spock, and McCoy are convinced that, this time, they're really going to die.  Kirk comes up with a way for them to spend their last hour.  Same as what was posted on the meme, except for the shameful grammar.</p>
            </blockquote>





	"Near Death Experience"

Kirk should've felt more confident. He'd always had a feeling he'd die alone, and Spock and McCoy were still with him. But now that things kept looking worse, it only made him think of a worse possibilty--that he was right and would survive, but his friends wouldn't.

It wasn't the first time they'd been close to death, but this time it felt different. Even Spock had--extremely reluctantly and vaguely--admitted to that.

They were facing something called the Vaporizer, the same machine that had killed Kane and Vasquez as a demonstration of its power, and they were still trapped in a room that seemed to have no doors and windows.

Kirk, Spock, and McCoy had all played their own versions of "Let them go/It's me you want". It wasn't the first time for that either.

Their communicators and phasers were gone, and any attempts to escape they could think of failed almost before they started. Spock had declared it an impossible problem.

"Damn you, you green blooded hobgoblin, you're giving up now?"

Spock practically glared at McCoy. "Dr. McCoy, I fail to see how the color of my blood or yours will change anything."

McCoy quickly looked away. "I'm sorry, Spock, I--it's not good, is it?"

"No, I do not believe it is."

"This would be the one thing we could agree on."

"Gentlemen, while this is a momentous occassion, I have no intention of giving up," said Kirk. He was Captain James T. Kirk after all. He should at least be able to find a way to get them out of here, even if he couldn't do anything for himself. In fact, the biggest problem was that Spock and McCoy would fight him every step of the way if they knew what he was doing. If he could figure out how to trick them into leaving him behind, the rest of it was relatively simple.

"And I'd like to add you're not putting a great deal of confidence in Mr. Scott."

"The one you call Scott has left this sector," said whatever was keeping them there. They'd never actually seen it--only heard it--but it seemed to have the same "powers beyond their comprehension" that these damn things usually did. "As you ordered him to do if you did not communicate with him. You have one Earth hour remaining."

"Plenty of time," said Kirk.

"Jim, Scotty would've obeyed that order," said McCoy.

"And none of us were on the bridge to suggest a different course of action," said Spock.

"It's good to know that at least somebody respects my orders," said Kirk. They both gave him their own versions of the look that meant he wouldn't be standing here if Spock had actually followed all of his orders. "Well, what do you want to do? Spend what could be the last hour of our lives moping? Sharing the terrible secrets we swore we'd never tell anyone? Promising we'll all meet for drinks in Heaven?"

"Spock doesn't drink," said McCoy.

"Nor do I believe in Heaven," said Spock. Something about that seemed to be troubling him.

Kirk didn't want to ask--they were all getting too morbid as it was. "It wouldn't be Heaven without you, Mr. Spock, so Bones and I'll just have to believe in it for you."

"This certainly isn't at all depressing," said McCoy. "Why don't we move on to death bed confessions?" He sat down next to Spock. "Mr. Spock, I do not find you as intolerable as I have previously stated."

"Thank you, doctor," said Spock. "May I add that my remarks that you are one of the most irrational, emotional creatures ever born were most likely an exaggeration?"

"If you two are done trading love letters, maybe we could look for a way out of here," said Kirk. "Or at least be adults about it and say what you mean."

"What's the point in that?" asked McCoy.

"It would be an exercise in redundancy," said Spock.

"Well, maybe I'd like to hear it," said Kirk.

"For god's sake, Jim, you know we're your friends."

"Just my friends?"

McCoy rolled his eyes. Spock raised both eyebrows. "Jim, you go through lovers the way most people go through kleenex," said McCoy. "We'd rather be your friends."

"You've talked about this?" asked Kirk.

"Yes, Jim, I sit around with _Spock_, and we talk about our feelings."

"All right, point taken," said Kirk. "But we're human, Bones. Why can't we just say--"

"You're so god damned vain," said McCoy. "You're not going to be happy until we both write you a sonnet or something."

"Actions do speak louder than words," Kirk said, almost to himself. He looked up at the ceiling. "I don't suppose we could make one last plea for our lives."

"Your species has been declared unworthy," said the Voice.

"And I keep telling you we're not all the same...never mind," said Kirk. "How much time do we have left?"

"You have one Earth hour remaining."

That didn't seem right, but Spock and McCoy didn't say anything. It couldn't be wrong if neither one of those two questioned it.

"One hour," said Kirk. "You know, I think in one hour we can put on quite a show for...whatever that thing is." That got him the tandem eyebrow raise. That was one of the things he'd really miss if they actually were going to die, but there was no time to dwell on that now because he was pulling Spock and McCoy towards him for a little trick he'd picked up at that place where the girls--god, what didn't those girls do? He coaxed their mouths open and kissed them both at the same time. One of them wrapped an arm around Kirk's back while the other one gripped his hair.

And then they both broke away and were kissing each other.

"His hands, Jim," said McCoy. He had one hand on Kirk's thigh and the other arm around Spock, who he was kissing so frantically that Kirk had to try not to dwell on the fact that they really had given up.

Kirk brought Spock's hand to his lips and kissed his way across the Vulcan's fingers. That didn't seem to do anything, so he tried licking Spock's palm.

For a brief moment he could see Spock genuinely enjoyed it--but then he caught himself and was going to pull away.

McCoy grabbed Spock's other hand and pressed it to his temple. Kirk hadn't noticed before just how often--and how intently--Spock and Bones stared at each other sometimes. The mind meld kicked in, and they both stared off at nothing.

Kirk slowly traced the lines on Spock's palm with his tongue and watched as they both arched their backs in unison. This could be quite interesting.

Unfortunately he didn't know what would be the most effective things to do to either one of them. He sucked Spock's middle and index fingers while he thought about it. He obviously had a much better idea of what humans liked than what Vulcans did, although Spock and Bones seemed quite fond of having Spock's fingers sucked.

Kirk probably had the most experience of the three of them, and it'd never hurt to ask in the past. He slowly licked Spock's fingers and asked, "How exactly does this work?"

"Why did you stop?" asked Spock, and Kirk wasn't really sure who he was talking to. That was also interesting.

"Shouldn't you both be a bit more...subtle?" he asked.

"You're asking this now?" That was probably Bones. "These are--were--powerful sensations. They are overwhelming to both of us."

He slid a hand up Bones's shirt and teased one of his nipples. "How're you two enjoying that?"

"Harder."

"Who's asking?"

"We are."

He assumed Bones would be all right with it and twisted. It worked, but not quite as well as the thing with the fingers. He leaned over and started to kiss Bones's neck. McCoy's hand tightened on his thigh, and both he and Spock inhaled sharply.

Spock's fingers were on his temple, ready to shift to the meld points.

"Let's save something for next time," said Kirk. "At least, for all of us."

Spock raised his arms and let McCoy pull his shirt off before mind melding with just Kirk.

He was relieved that McCoy had also vetoed the group mind meld. And he felt small and petty for what wanting Spock to say what he felt now that he was surrounded by his thoughts. But that didn't matter because it didn't change anything.

He wanted to know why McCoy had started the other meld, but somehow Spock kept that blocked off. And then McCoy bit Spock's (their) shoulder, and it felt amazing. Because of course McCoy had managed to look up what exactly Vulcans--or at least Spock--liked. Kirk could feel McCoy behind Spock, stroking the tip of an ear and reaching past him to squeeze and fondle Kirk through his pants.

Then the meld was gone, and it was just him and Spock in their own bodies. Out of the corner of his eye he could see McCoy digging through his medkit. "Can't believe I actually brought it," he muttered.

Spock was practically on top of him, his skin incredibly hot, as Kirk watched McCoy take the rest of his clothes off. Kirk awkwardly tried to get the rest of their clothes off without getting in Spock's way. Whoever made boots part of the uniform was either a sadist or a eunuch.

"What the hell kind of threeway is this?" Kirk asked when he remembered he needed to breathe. "Quit watching and get over here and pull your weight."

"Is that an order, captain?"

"You're damn right it is." Not enough people called him "captain" in situations like this.

McCoy squirted something in Spock's hand, then wrapped Spock's fingers around his dick.

"What's that?" asked Kirk the next time Spock gave him a chance to talk.

"Somehow I just knew we'd need lube," said McCoy.

"Convenient," said Kirk. "Like the time he gave earlier..." He nudged Spock off him, then stood up. Kirk pulled his other boot off, practically tore off his pants and underwear, and dragged them all down to the floor. He had no idea what had happened to his shirt, but at least it would stand out among the rest of their clothes.

Bones was behind him. "Well, what are you waiting for?" asked Kirk and McCoy grinned at him before starting to slowly and carefully slide in.

Spock had stood up again to take off the rest of his clothes. Kirk started to draw Spock into his mouth, but was stopped. "That would not be particularly effective, Jim." He knelt on the floor and wrapped his hand around Kirk. "I think we will both find this much more enjoyable."

"I wish you'd started using this kind of logic sooner," said McCoy.

"Gentlemen, I'm not as fragile as you both seem to think," said Kirk.

"I always figured he'd like it rough," said McCoy.

"You agree with the theory that one's tastes in the bedroom tend to be the opposite of their every day personality?" asked Spock.

Neither one of them was going any faster or harder. "No, just a hunch," said McCoy.

"You are both absolutely killing me," said Kirk.

"I think he could ask a bit nicer," said McCoy. "What do you think, Spock?"

"I agree, doctor," said Spock. With his other hand he reached around Kirk to McCoy.

"Do you want me to beg?" asked Kirk.

"I thought that was quite obvious," said Spock.

"Well, then please. Fuck me harder."

"Jim, that has got to be some of the worst begging I've ever heard. Spock could do better."

"Try me, doctor."

"What do you think I'm doing now?"

They finally picked up the pace a bit, just enough to drive him even crazier. For awhile Spock was able to match McCoy almost exactly, but whatever Bones was doing had to be good--Spock seemed to be losing his concentration.

"I'm not really going to stop, Spock," McCoy said softly. "Not unless you want me to."

"I would prefer for you to continue."

"Maybe I'm expecting too much from you two," said Kirk. It worked much better than begging probably would have--for whatever reason, Spock and McCoy would almost always take a dare. He was getting closer and closer.

Spock buried his face in Kirk's shoulder and came without a sound. Shortly after that, Kirk realized he had started begging Spock to keep going, that he just needed a little more--and thank god he and Bones got off at almost the same time before he had to beg them both.

And all too soon he was back to the fact that they probably didn't have very much time left. Kirk put an arm around each of his friends and decided that he owed it to them to lie like hell. "We're going to get out of here," he said. "I have no idea how we're going to explain this to Scotty, but I know everything's going to be okay. Because I've always known I'd--"

"You are correct, Earth man," said the Voice. "You have passed our test and proven yourselves worthy. Your lives shall be spared."

"Test," said Kirk. "This was...a test?"

"Jim, let's just get the hell out of here," said McCoy.

"No, Bones, I want to know what right these things have to judge who lives or who dies," said Kirk. "How they can decide who's unworthy and who's not after this...manipulative stunt."

"Given the amount of power they can wield, I feel that it would be better to leave before they are struck by another whim," said Spock.

"Why am I the only one who's bothered by this?" asked Kirk. "We've just been abducted, locked up for god knows how long, and kept here until we--"

***

He woke up on the planet's surface. He was dressed again and Spock and McCoy were holding him up.

"--still say we shouldn't have done it."

"Yet you agree that time was of the essence," said Spock. "Since the captain would not listen to reason, this was the most logical course of action."

"Well, I still don't think it was the right thing to do."

"Doctor, if you would prefer to remain imprisoned and convinced of your own imminent death, you are more than welcome to offer yourself to those beings."

It usually took someone at least half an hour to wake up from a Vulcan nerve pinch. Spock and McCoy had been having this same argument for half an hour. They had probably had it while one of them--no, they both would've gotten his clothes back on because they'd probably been hoping to get him on the ship and claim the Voice had done it. They'd argued while they both put his clothes back on and dragged him out here to beam up so they could _imply_ that they'd had nothing to do with it.

"You nerve pinched me," said Kirk.

"I felt it was necessary," said Spock once they rematerialized in the transporter room.

"You were outvoted," said McCoy.

"You agree with Spock?"

"Hell no. But I wanted to get out of there."

Kirk wanted a shower, and he felt like he hadn't slept in days. Maybe he hadn't. None of them could really tell how many times the Voice had told them there was only an hour left and made them believe it.

He didn't know if he wanted to talk about what had happened. McCoy's remark about his love life had stuck with him. Maybe it was better to treat this as just something that happened when you were utterly convinced you were going to die.

***

It irritated him that Spock and McCoy were completely back to normal. They treated him and each other exactly the same as they always had. Kirk felt like something should have changed--ideally for the better--but his friends were treating being manipulated by a nearly omnipotent alien lifeform as normal. Which, in a way, it was, but none of them had ever tricked them into having sex before.

He decided to start with Bones, who'd at least admit to having emotions.

"Is that what this is about?" McCoy asked. "It was the circumstances that were fake."

"Why did you mind meld with Spock?" asked Kirk. "What was it you told him?"

"Just that we love him even if he emotes all over the place or not," said McCoy. "Just like we'll still put up with you no matter how many times chasing after some strange alien nearly gets you killed. So either quit sulking or just admit you did it under mind control."

"I did mean it, Bones," said Kirk. "I just expected--"

"From us?" asked McCoy. "Jim, we're probably going to go to a strip club next shore leave, you'll pick up at least one girl, and I'll come back to complain to Spock. Who'll probably try to pretend Vulcans have evolved beyond fun."

"I don't have to--"

"Now, I think the problem would be if you tried to make a bunch of promises we all know you can't possibly keep," said McCoy. "Which is why we're your friends, Jim. If we have to bring romance into it, we've got to pretend nobody's going to see a pretty girl and get upset over what happens on shore leave or when Spock gets some weird chemical in him. And it'll be a month before we all hate each other."

"What if we shared the girl?" asked Kirk.

"Now that would be a bit more practical," said McCoy. "And Spock could still complain about our base, emotional natures, so that should work out just fine for everybody."

"Let me just make sure I'm clear on this," said Kirk. "Everything is the same as it was before, except now we'll be having sex?"

"Do I need to give you a demonstration?"

"Bones, I can't help it if I'm a tactile learner." Perhaps he had been taking it all too seriously. And if they really didn't care if he continued to be irresistible to humanoid females...He would have to ask if he could only get away with humanoid _women_, but he could probably manage with just the two of them.


End file.
